Wednesday, January 31, 2007

Is it Just Me? (2)

Is it just me?, or has the concept of manners changed while I wasn't looking?

I don't mean to come across all crotchety or anything, especially since I have that reputation, but I am beginning to think that I might be something of a curmudgeon.

Here is my drift: Just about every Sunday, after church, we go to lunch at our local Bob Evans restaurant. We do this pretty much every Sunday, and something that I regularly see there is bothering more and more. It is something that has always bothered me, but has become nearly unbearable: Men who wear hats indoors, and especially at the table.

Since when is this ok? Did I miss something?! I was raised in the in the 1970's... has that much changed? I was raised to believe that a man wears a hat to cover his head to keep it dry, or warm, or to protect it from the sun. A man also wears a hat if it is part of a uniform. I was also trained to believe that no man who has any business being called a gentleman, keeps his hat on when he is indoors. I was raised to believe that it is no less than an outrage to be seated for a meal while wearing a hat.

Yes I know that there are exceptions, but generally speaking: Hats worn indoors are verboten.

These days you see it all over the place. Baseball caps... often two sizes too large, sitting sideways or backwards on the head of some teenager, or worse, an adult, who thinks he is being fashion-forward. Bad enough that it usually looks kind of stupid, but worse when done indoors... ok, I'm not that rigid... I get it if you are wearing a hat in the mall... the mall is sort of today's answer to Main street. I get that.... but when you are in a restaurant? C'mon, guys!

The other thing that has been bothering me a great deal is this trend: Talking on your cel phone during a meal. Whats that all about? Must you really answer that call during dinner? It isn't that I care if you are rude at home, but do I really need to hear your conversation?

While we are on the subject of telephones... The bookstore. Why can't you use your inside voice on your cel phone? you really needn't shout... that device that you are speaking into is a microphone. See, it picks up your voice, and amplifies it for the receiver that you are speaking to. Thats how that works. Why Can't you have that conversation in the bookstore cafe? Would you make that much noise in a library?

You probably would, you f***ing barbarian!


Zanne said...

Ok you, breathe with me
Feel better or at least non-homicidal? Actually, I have to say, it's not you. The whole idea that there are gentlemen left in the world is harder and harder to believe (mostly because I ride the NYC bus and subway twice a day--so perhaps I'm not the best judge!) Think that's why I appreciate you so much! :D

Kelley said...

Every once in awhile - when my hair is doing crazy, unattractive things - I'll wear a baseball cap on the weekends. I've worn it to eat at places like Subway or Pizza Hut, but I wouldn't wear it to eat in a "real" restaurant.

So I guess I'm a little guilty myself... But I swear, I do my best to be presentable most of the time!

Gunfighter said...

Thank you, Zanne.

Kelley... the rules are different for women. You get to wear a hat.

the only daughter said...

Sad to say, but your observations are spot on. First of all, baseball caps...enough already. They do not go with everything. And as for wearing them indoors, for shame. While you are eating? Double shame.

I don't even want to get started on the cell phone rudeness that has permeated the populous. -aarggh-

Some restaurants have banned the usuage of cell phones in the dining areas. ~~This is a cell phone free environment~~ I might look for this calling card before making a reservation.

Janet said...

They would and they do, every damn day. I can't tell you how often I have to tell someone we do not allow cel phone use in the library.

Leslie said...

Manners have definitely changed. It isn't just the hats and cell phones. I've had so many encounters where someone has mowed me down out in public without a simple, "Excuse me." And holding a door open for someone? Rarely happens these days, that I see.

It's especially disconcerting when my 2-year old turns to me and says of an adult, "He didn't say 'thank you,' mommy." My toddler knows better than some people!

Grimm said...

Well GF - you got me. Before I had my head shaved, my hair was a total complete abomination and I wore a cap everywhere I went (admittingly I didn't even think about it).

It's been awhile since I have done it and now that I know the rudeness of it I will ceast to do it again.

Thanks for pointing it out - I really never knew.

Now cellphones in resteraunts should die.

Anonymous said...

You are over reacting about the hats but you are very correct about the cel phones. last time I went to a restraunt the guy at the table next to me was shouting into his cellphone, which really pissed me off. i dont know about you but hats dont bug me very much.

Gunfighter said...

Hats may not bug you, sir, but it changes the facts not onw whit!

It is inappropriate for a man to wear a hat indoors, and even more inappropriate to wear a hat at the table.