Wednesday, February 14, 2007

Gunfighter's Grammy Recap

You already know that I love award shows, so it is time for Gunfighter's Grammy Recap. Sorry I'm late… but I've been sick. OK, that’s a lame excuse, but I've been busy, deal with it.

Before I start, I'd like to thank TiVo, for giving me the opportunity to start watching the show an hour and a half after it started, so that I could fast forward through the boring stuff, and repeat other things that I didn't catch the first time.

Please note that my comments were made in real time.

If you are the child of the late seventies/early eighties, could you possibly start a Grammy show better than with a reunion of The Police? I have always loved them as a group, starting with their "Zenyatta Mondatta" album. Having been jazzed up for this, I have to say that I was a bit let down. Even though Sting and Messrs. Summers and Copeland are still as musically gifted as ever, I think that they should have played something else instead of "Roxanne"… Sting just can't get those high notes anymore, and what good is Roxanne without the high notes? At the end, though, it was fun, even if only for the novelty.

Jamie Foxx opened the show with jokes about The Police & Snoop Dogg… not funny.

The first award was for best pop collaboration, which was won by Tony Bennett and Stevie Wonder. Yes, you read it correctly. These people must be kidding me . You should have called it the "Give-the-two-old-guys-an-award-category". Great God… Tony Bennett actually thanked TARGET! For being such a great sponsor… at which time the music started playing.

Joan Baez was next, introducing the Dixie Chicks. Good for them. They are nominated for song of the year and album of the year. They sang, "I'm Not Ready To Make Nice" I have never heard the song but I like it. You know me… I'm always the guy with my fist in the air.

Um, can I say that the Dixie Chicks all looked rather hot? Well, they did... and I'm not really a fan of theirs.

Prince was next… and not wearing purple… he says: "one word. Beyonce" Ms. Knowles begins warbling some R&B diva song that makes me doubt her talent. I don't know the song and I don't like it. As much as I love curvy women, I have to say that the dress she is wearing makes her hips look wide enough to land a space shuttle on… and it is see through! Whats up with that?

The Black Eyed Peas presented Booker T and The MG's a lifetime achievement award, which they deserve even if they never made any more music after "Green Onions", which, in my humble opinion, is the coolest song ever recorded.

The BEP's then present the best R&B album award to Mary J. Blige. I didn't know any of those albums, but I was pulling for Prince… just because he is so cool. During her remarks, MJ Blige thanked everybody on the friggin' planet!"

Hey, there is a new Geico commercial, with the Gecko!

Weatherman predicts snow for tomorrow night.

After the break, Justin Timberlake sings "What Goes Around Comes Around" Another song that I have never heard of.

Pink and TI (WHO?) then presented the award for the best female R&B vocal to Mary J. Blige. This is starting to shape up into her year. Will she thank Jesus again? She does.

Stevie Wonder is Next. He started out singing "Overjoyed" (badly) and then introduces Corrine Rae Bailey, Jamhn Mayer, and John Legend. I didn't know J. Mayer could play the jazz/bluesguitar like that. (I read just today, in Rolling Stone, that he is being called the successor to Eric Clapton.). I am predicting that Corrine Rae Bailey will be big soon… you heard it from me first.

Nelly Furtado, Natasha Beddingfield, and Nicole something-or-another from the Pussycat Dolls, presented the award for best pop vocal album to John Mayer. Good for him. I like him. Good speech, too.

Shakira and Wyclef are next, singing "Hips Don't Lie"… it wasn't their best performance for that song, but really, who cares? Shakira is lovely to look at.

Next, Seal and some other old dude give an award to Herb Alpert and some other guy named Moss for an industry icon award. Then they gave the award for song of the year to The Dixie Chicks, for "Not Ready To Make Nice Yet". To their great credit, they didn't make a political speech… although I wouldn't have blamed them for if they had.

The next performer was Gnarls Barkely. He sang "Does that make me crazy?" I love this song. I'd never expect those notes form such a big man. To tell you the truth, I always thought Seal sang that song.

Best Rap Album presented by Common and Kanye West. Ludacris wins… and gives special shout-outs to Bill O'Reilly and Oprah. I'm not really a Ludacris fan, but I have to say that I found this to be really funny.

Terence Howard presents Opera singer Maria Callas a lifetime achievement award. He also introduces a performance by Mary J Blige. I have to say that I have never been a fan of Mary's, but she really sings things this song. I'm not even sure of the name.

Mandy Moore, LeAnne Rimes and Luke Wilson. Best Country Album. Dixie Chicks, Alan Jackson, Little Big Town, Willie Nelson, Josh Turner. Dixie Chicks win!!!!!

Reba McIntyre introduces Carrie Underwood and Rascall Flatts, who are presenting an award to The Roots of Country music and the Eagles. RF does "Hotel California" (Good). Underwood does "Desperado"… she probably shouldn't have. Then Rascall Flatts and Carrie Underwood combined to do "Life in The Fast Lane". I think Carrie should stick to country music, because she blows. I'm sorry but she does.

Natalie Cole presents Ornette Coleman, who is a jazz clarinet player, with a lifetime achievement award. Then they present the award for best new artist, which is won by Carrie Underwood. I guess that means a lot of people more important to the music industry than me, actually like her. Well, my opinion is unchanged.

Then Christina Aguilera (without any introduction) sings the James Brown classic "It's a man's man's man's world". She even does some classic JB moves with the mic stand.. That child has got some pipes!!!!!!!!

James Blunt sings "You're Beautiful", which is a really nice song, but I have to say that I don't care if I never hear it again.

If you were watching… did you see Jennifer Hudson in the red dress? She was SMOKIN'

Quentin Tarantino & Tony Bennett present Record of The Year to The Dixie Chicks, which just goes to show you how times change.

Al Gore and Queen Latifa presented the award for best rock album to the Chili Peppers. Al Gore looked great.

By now, everyone who is paying any attention knows that album of the year went to The Dixie Chicks. Although I never heard anything from the album until tonight, I am glad that they won. I think that the people in this country need to know that they can and should speak out when they think that their government is wrong. More importantly, they shouldn't have to be afraid when they do.


Tasha said...

I didn't bother to TiVo the awards, and only caught some in passing. So thanks for the commentary! Your comment about Beyonce and her space shuttle hips is killing me!

Happy Valentine's Day

Leslie said...

I missed The Grammys, which is also a testament to how times change. I would have never missed such a show in my younger years. Thanks for the recap!

Anonymous said...

I’m interested to see what this adds to the dialog. Curious stuff in this independent film! :

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Gunfighter said...


I don't think that the film will add anything to the conversation.

Natalie Maines is an American citizen and has the right to say that she thinks the President of the United States is wrong. At it doesn't matter if there is a war on or not... especially when the war is one of choice, not necessity.

Anonymous said...

Join Today!

Grimm said...

Once I heard I had missed the Grammy's did I head for the entertainment websites? No...

I come here to get the straight scoop.

Great job man.